From the darkness, I said to the Lord:
“Like a dry and parched field, my soul longs for the nourishing rain of heaven. Scorched by the trials and troubles of this world, it cries out for relief and for the divine presence of the only One able to bring it.
How long, Oh Lord, will You remain silent? How long will you gaze upon the fallow ground of my heart as it calls upon You to enrich it with Your holiness? Will You remain silent forever? Will You leave Your servant to fend for herself, to wander the deserts of this world in search of You?
Do not tarry, Lord! Do not hold back Your presence from me! Speak to me, Lord. Let me hear Your voice!
As You “measured the waters in the hollow of [Your] hand,” measure Your servant’s devotion to You. Weigh my love for You upon Your scales and if I am found lacking, adjust the balance for Your good pleasure. From Your heavenly throne, look down upon me with tenderness and rain Your Spirit down upon my barren heart!
Return to me, Oh Lord!”
From the light, the Lord answered:
“Lift your eyes, beloved. I am here. Look to the heavens; gaze upon the earth. Tell me, what do you see?
The heavens speak of My glory; "the skies proclaim the work of [My] hands." Marvel at the bounties I have set in place for you, the mercies I have poured out upon you. Have they been found wanting? Have I not sheltered and watched over you as a shepherd tenderly cares for his flock?
When you wandered, did I not leave the flock and go in search of you, gently carrying you upon My shoulders back into the safety of My fold?
When you cried out in darkness, did I not rush to bring you back into My light?
And when you reclined upon your bed, overwhelmed with anguish and despair, did I not lay My right hand upon your shoulder and give you peace?
Am I not “the Lord…the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth”? I do not “grow tired or weary” as mere men whose strength fails them. I do not cause men to stumble on rocky paths, for My pathway is clear, My steps are sure and the way is known to you, for I have made it known.
I AM the everlasting God. My love for you will not wane. My ancient eyes are ever upon you for I made you Mine from before the beginning. I measure each step you take. I have breathed My life into you. I will not shut My ears to your call. Therefore, My arm is not too short, nor My sight too dim, that I will not rescue you, though you stumble or grow faint.
Draw not away from Me, beloved, for I, too, desire your presence. Return to Me and I will renew your strength. I will pour out My power upon your weakness and I will carry you if you grow weary. For, lo, I am with you always.”
Humbled, I said to the Lord:
“Oh Lord, how could I have doubted You! How could I have wandered away so far from You that I could not see You have never left my side? Forgive my wanderings and my unbelief!
How You have made my heart soar within me! Because of Your untiring faithfulness, You have refreshed the soil of my heart and made the roots of my love for You grow deeper! Like the wind that chases away the chaff, You have cleansed me once again with Your abounding love. My faith and trust are strengthened and You have placed my feet back on Your path of righteousness. Where You lead, I will follow.
Your wisdom cannot be measured, for You are the Sovereign Lord; the Maker of all things, both seen and unseen. You have reopened my eyes to Your wonder and majesty and my renewed hope remains in You, my Lord and my God.
I will look upon Your glory that fills the heavens and the earth, and I will praise You forever and ever!”
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